As a woman rocking ADHD, I cannot begin to guess how many times either impulse, or filter failure resulted in my loudly saying Something Stupid. I also have impeccable timing, since these loud declarations almost always coincide with the exact moment a group falls silent.
Surely even y’all typically-brained know what I’m talking about? Facebook and twitter prove that word vomit afflicts everyone, but the frequency with which I’ve had to dance around under the mistletoe of an unfortunate statement– No, NO, don’t look up!? You’d think I’d stop talking so damn much, right?
I regularly perform wincing facepalms about what I say– whether they be categorized as thoughtless, tactless, or, um… nice-less.
And then my personal favorite of all the mouth-flying-phrases: sadistic. Nothing other than sadism and a serious Case of the Mondays can explain why: “no more TV–AND THAT INCLUDES VIDEO GAMES–for the rest of May.” came out of my mouth.
It took 30 years from the first instance of hearing, “this is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you”, but I finally believe my parents spoke the truth.
Okay, so I am reasonably strict on screen time. I fear that hour of glazed-eye electronic box babysitting is going to be a lot like a pre-baby pelvic floor: the full reach of the importance if it won’t be appreciated until it’s gone.
But y’all? I’m am so DONE with the bickering, the fighting, the constant whining. I need a drastic change, or I’m buying a fresh pair of panty hose, dusting off the resume, and getting a paying job.
I might have also mentioned that all future attempts to get my attention through negative methods will result in the removal of tangible goods. In other words, when they fight to get my attention, I’m going to respond–not by yelling–but by removing large piles of their shit. They tried to call my bluff on that yesterday.
I need to learn how to play poker.
Sooooo…. No TV. No Wii. No IPad. Ten days left in May. Oh, did I mention the last day of school is a mere 3 days away?
Wish me sanity, y’all.