Spider Pig is Your Friend

I often finding it refreshing (and–dare I say– fun?) to volunteer at Zach’s preschool. It’s extremely helpful to observe his interaction with Other Small People Unrelated to Him. My last volunteer day was also music day, and it was then that I was first introduced to Spider Pig. Apparently one of the other parents just loves the Spider Pig song.

I saw a trying-to-be-cool-by-not-conforming-teenager wearing a Spider Pig t-shirt this afternoon, and when I mentioned it to Zach, Joel started to sing it for us.

“You know of Spider Pig?” I asked.

“Yeah, Homer did this thing with a pet pig once– walking it across the ceiling…

Google? Yes.

How did I miss the Spider Pig episode? Based on nothing scientific, I’m going to estimate having spent about 500 nights eating dinner on the floor of the living room at the table, watching Simpsons and Family Guy reruns the world news.

I’m assuming all parents have experienced trying to shove leaking brain fluids back to whence they came as a result of repetitious, horrific children’s songs?

Even the songs that you first found catchy are only there to suck brain matter. If you are like me you will realize–alone, in a dark basement, that Biz’s Beat of the Day is going to be the last thing you hear when the serial killer stabs you to death. You will also reconsider the amount of Criminal Minds type shows you watch on tv.

For the record I include any song bastardized by kidz bop. Children singing Hey Ya? THERE IS NO REASON.

Perhaps you are on the phone and need to recall your last name? Nope, that space has been filled with So Yummy, So Yummy.

Or perhaps you purchase what seemed like an innocent book/CD combo to help your small children learn to repress express strong feelings.

Spider Pig is your friend– he can help you.

Spider Pig- choral

Spider Pig- techno

Crank that Spider Pig- Hip Hop (mild language)

Youtube, causing raucous laughter in children since… well whenever it started.

Isn’t technology amazing? Those lucky children with their immediate access to an abundance of relevant information. And, lest you doubt– SPIDER PIG IS RELEVANT. Unless you like I love you, you love me?

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